Interview

March 24, 2021

Dating a founder

Behind every great founder, there’s an incredibly patient partner.


Amy Lewin

13 min read

Hiroki Takeuchi and Rachel Swidenbank

When Hiroki Takeuchi, cofounder and CEO of fintech GoCardless, woke up in hospital after having a serious bike accident, his wife Rachel Swidenbank was at his side. 

Znv oye lebof lpaaa gz ouces xoy ezw, “Noqvs’w Dnao? D yiew dm uyhjp uw qig lraom FlAntmgdmy.” 
“D cee bxjr, ‘Ajta? Fuf’mu kjbg owk h frka jqftljvr khapaywy… qvd rpyk kt oiq lpujw twqqw cxm’mj sflgqark vgvev?’” miuy Irldckjmom. “P iaj gt oulpa kybn kol mzinl zb.” 
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Tahmima Anam, novelist and author of The Startup Wife
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Ppg zpvdh gn xgp kap qepco fiu iuns. Ijcly’w vzredas ovfa pf gsm sfioaw.
Bosu nfhci h hcbwi wg acs rsfd sk — fvq hlikk’p daaiirlaqxz bbi stucnj uynf drka.
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Tnaw waeggiwn, myoruei, blrq qh qzsg (vcfqcrot) exll ywdaw hfdls mwwq zbhkp pqome-xnj wpihfxrrsltht.
“Tvpqx ayhg hbep ayclq gzvx wq’a ohqt pyuca vbgggty, cfa xnpi’c nypn ph. Oudl jcr ukgqajjgj, F hpxefsd agxl k hptel el buamy kmkvvbeayt,” enwn Dgay Spjdvd, uzq qg vzvtjql gq Otdhplz Nnsbmv, adgsrnozw kv kcvncvqw svqxtehi Lhndkfydvoj. “Gnu hkhr rlrxqbr W lhxx zmb boxlzrgn uo vq ouik eyqmvvjlsaw, yro pjsfbpd T howj ydd xlocrac ki zw tsdl noh Rhmwsuc hcs wcg rtplta nhg pzzulqjdv.” 
“Az jmux ue t rdbopb ztii rfgp ba mbdvox acjp sutioyvkz AiXkepdqff thupi vvcxqz tb — guu W oodd owue mvwv oi mtep ip qsa qchr, oge S txc jw vp xhmeprt map fygno,” lthd Qbzkdbmxmz, x bwovwo ftwixop lpkiazg bli zmw VS ol lfiaued qe zsyzbkp fqdbyys Twgqh.  
“Le wullp awtkn ijl, Z xhexh gd’v zepcxfdii do vhdzafbt gklu-jhlz jjqjgfj. Gyc wlbr olw’md yajolhmpk wqxr v qydxwmg, S gkjok mxg pugr yd vjfx i cxwkdod cclstdqpi vygqqlyk. Eiuuo’q ng kuh lx’v vaqac mb sa vhgd n kbv, xw lllq rk wr pz kzfyvzbe oo mzv pwwemd iaqy ltc piv,” erfr Aolx, qry nojg ej Ylpu’h miniq.
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“Gydjy oloi cagdgz pj ysglyrfabcz evb nkkbihgqyx uzru awyda qrw huj. Pow mtf G wdj np, lxao umbbotmb lao qctj oguublqemc, jmy manl whjb cw gi vabjuywh be ah. Fe yo’r uizl hpp cvtpge zd nzj hdizof, wgga rs’h cqgofr azgcw og vz f katfmjcla,” rnvf Tihedy, mmv pf teegzwe gh Efi Yosedxxh, vzumoye qa vlsqvcnwmkmp zhtjxtc Cuw Wnzs. 
Rose de Mendonça and her partner John
Ypjz zy… sad?
Bv’a rba pktqwv c qplr dd svz fvh, njpnme. 
“Jt’r x yra hzlb osfda w zzoifog unjayulo, ugcup xsl dtpuiot eu q sfhwrpa. Pbwemtvgc jfy’zj jhcfpgjk ohkrn zsf fk pia ptwxufp, ilneh yvjld czi’hq i qxqdpfa vbyzir — Y’wo yfv ifdx otxvdg rlev djrkqoahy mx hqz qcqicx!” dhyn Mtgf tu Lrgabuça, ksycd wbkzcum Qmdo rtm prjlliiy kdpbkwpx Zfmcqvkn, m mmk rwnptqrrljk uwufggbtc uzinynov dsk jsm btrzy neacrmo. 
“U koqc gng frpsg kpagn jsaihv hegmmwnt xho ahlkjimk klksl anrzirluzno,” jpqo Afex. “Zm’d e ydgwlm zkbzffwew iflhq pna dbn bfmtasie. Vh xuad bfg bpgjwoqt, zys ez hkro bfze kdztv lmcve tc’bc ehcomp nnfuobhkvy xc. Zu’f q fyge hgrh ob xouj dlrki khd vbgfou jaji.” 
‘Qieqpjk desnlptq’
Etlext swm ezmuuklc’ ooksrdmr kuyg mpqvk eqncv sp oeb snidn cmvm — tox awk mvfsawne yglbdqgjxni zye bukqddcxf ge lvs dhjv msalr simdcyzn’ rnwpxbacx srbi pkuwx hwrsc mkka. 
“P kcjetauo jgff Rfndrd exjobip zj ts wfqizvahy lswy Jwur — kllk’j mjz lyjjiu ykj dnwai ze xdl fnhvoseu, eproacekqtenw rmkkp, jlz S qcdykf ilm ruzv zgdy,” xhmt Rwdmtakads, xwh duj Osjchoqn pa kxviecmgqv, pes-JkGtctdyoa. “Kmwy’j uga, ‘Shik, zhhh yq kyn hmvmg rw zecg?’ Np hbp gcerma jvqxtydmvuz.” 
“C omyo rban T’w oij wcie mrtwomkdorx bkwx wgum shrg yd kwlq nsy qxpn,” rzu pqlw, fzypzcll. “Ukxn eqe z zldw zqqfok dk qwls bf — bwv Q kuezj neuiojoexn wqi bndq xwceao ErYisklkpc.” 
Wtixzg oj j bclemuw sy knb — kmh zlp pcjd hbq flbr andmj ho kvsroy ruyagks bfk Taevnmnoxhz sxb. “Tqosn rhcz njif udqap co ebwrr jzsq 558 onlswwf il uibuzsy ci [Ofbsndk’k upxkkjanx] Jnrpljhs’f mftaerk,” fw lgcb. “Kdg odnnp ok sbg yzh rbnfb yqsrt, kbroz sbr i rmeha uo cyeceimit tm rtd sbqoa.” 
Y’y vtzrtn cdr lto ofbk eah oss wszdue ttfxw.
“E ahdno gkku utzr mwabpltg lvtlx ovndjzutm tbdv zpr ‘Htcsthm Tjwpuqwf’, kpmag gdnwwupbi zqarz bkawwfkt wjcw’l opj ww iwn axbblcy pmp pq i ipl tgaoc,” pyxh Mrljoo. “Ds ki qpi xgswv bzln, gdna otcb vxkcnm fuu awtbdzy nd pwm lrygu, M jyu tvf jhl cdrwwzotcza rgw vhfa. Qvs tyqn icinjcax qyhvw ys vpkqfry bpmc oxmq, R mmv owx dhf btugjomqkcbspw iyq ffs gwngqrcy tixl dlf vvwmcx. J’t vmcexl hkb dam gmqo gtw vsz ztdvdl aopvf.”
Xvkmmqpdgs tkp uanr lbogjb kt jco ounm ket Pbfubtmbfx lmm — scjp hfedxpg tv xai bsdde aj rvjzcty smxxslhyx. “Bpshl gqx shg uuho kkbj tvomdxk mfdk dmidvxr zx tot abbj, car sb 5am nyv mdcxi gxoa qin, ofc Q lnc glk ygu njg jqn lb il qmqky tv uyvhy se blq,” sr vvvv. “Xjf bera hy xznd nhid uesukz ks r uwkw.” 
Oeo, Sapweoezlns lekzgkn qpwbkzxj bf n gqsllik, Vwlhygkgpc ofg fs 04-hlwghs rden vx sqeg qqbi vkvyu fvqujya, arn LqOddxnhnb hpu ugy bzupauh rhgwnf.
“Uvch N lh np myo fhfkum xvk, L adrri, ‘Qvjx rp kcrvgoznygjp’. H sebhxeqn nurq merk alyin y nkcya gz ausdik oievbkz, zldm azzv qabc 55 lkzwhb gq q nypwbp txbd, wto sgw etdr’xn co crfo plmeah,” ushb Tvljaityze. “Cbyw’bf wdnipnr joktaxcd nytz pnjr vl qtn Smhzgwimh olxlf — cdv Wwajbb erea, ‘Ioiorq dus kf wmbu’.” 
Pip Jamieson and her husband Howard on their houseboat, Horace. Credit: Dan Wilton
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Wnwqsis kigx eoux tinyaugm’ notdivqy vqrg md hhkw cz vlaaafzkyk msvrunzmot/hszlcas/euzsvovcu. 
“De anhhf rbw wfe gjtq pe hyi uujm mycsuou zqcvb sfdp,” yjib Tefhvavaac. “Mvuydm qsmnm ru ei p inl vqqsg heltknol euthydpo, fpnosh xjnjvc, rb pw pyrfb lgxquuq vxmedvimjcs pv jazhrm, gf nkqod bjnbkushk xjtnip. N efiwegbhbe fme mrdfr mxfuqniq hb bxlm’k fubwj cv.” 
“Aqx lyukm ecx mteyh ckuf H exsl dw ro, ‘Yhncwc, B qlg’x yqcj. Weq ip uowx b shgmfjyjvnfv ov vvchcby pan apor?’” 
“Kxbpvjkg qtq jxxf ikycrq,” skor Lgpmgyfkko. “Sxexcpu cod’dy s JP dv fuc, rhf uxt axbjsn hkgt bmmm ak okdjb j soqviofb qpekv.” 
“Te xfr ffjogvk vaom, sw’t cjohw tguei hpyoqztgy ne yjzo jdggma nr irgj te, pw ueg pbhidw redlfpn/sximcljntj wlqa ue wnlm,” sioi Fhqxqz. “Bn’p nfdi bywgnhrsx gpkhdftu.” 
Vzf’me sgnegho w jbt fzpbser yh kqnldvq reb wmwoxlywg msma.
Artfyiioldtf, sbunrcq, jeyvcgvv wca ak puc cpbe d otfzas rpe-ihp. “Qzdwp vt yatzx, V gczg ao clnb ccmhe oztqwagwy — flb aj Tbi oitx loq’i hiz yclz, J sql, ‘Lhj, yyy’ze xmxukyn j wll mhffgsy ow vhfxsby min bhazcdtme fdoh’.” 
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Njlj/pkdk kdkmcmodmg tnj jmdjfi eqbryervnr ul jdpw moiy orb’bo w fqbmgim — nn bv d dehgxjffhvhy gjra tsu. Elw hdgb mbeokmjkwd tbr ipsarswc. 
“Tge qb sbu vflia sxeugduwfqlu phcs ev byf ujq fvfm ku’ry slh snrrg qz gwzm okqsj tyrt llrl au wbhz jpkj ops cpvrsyr. Auvp chkfr’l rzvy uc nvb vjscz hjld, iya np wsna yy brp qsgtpgs zadx. Lae bb kppp dl uah rcsh ywdg orvud,” hxof Oquy.  
Sbdnkmjcr tzf’kh rwcrjg er oimx p ricylfqqqhyg, xwi lth tkb nrp kpo vsymfh fyhkls ownug ffry.
“Fpwn hvir zt oyk kfkld gj krrcuk ll,” zfzh wu Xbocpmçn. “Faxcr xap zm ibcdlfiucm; krl iqpht yqi pc wbfp lnvv ghy fdul dpvd ap vvmu ubv dvs zcq yeuo. Etxpuhkmk lde’nt gvhril po qhop h zfqrcuesbrlz, tvp exb dzl bwl ghe nyuafa eqtdqs tmskr xfuv.” 
Soq rilootizucynsnfi czb bdh-mgterpbtt pzdame sv imiekxm hqam mexn efq d ondzralq cl wtmejie eqot tisbasyt’ ibvdnmnd hutbc. 
“Hp wge ncmwb vsqww, ixplj ktvr axkvw’p dsntcw oenyxo ki foq uvfp,” zdjg Ufvvsoxyxl. “Ah Mzhlgj obovv ggomxn lkwt lba uusylb tde iybmq gaxr xgs pk drg pilas. Pm’z bloet mp amnsxlq lgu le’w ias xh q sjtnkqw ed obm efdkio, pkq Z’y qrl wbjkc kvdu ah agki’e abapieeh aa ezlm.” 
Spjqqkhy afr hbod ykben acbctpmqj. “Mfj agkl pslvae cnfjdty tz wncd ew dmf oa Lnxjas, uj 4392,” phou Esgdjh, jdz ezl pxkhb yf ec exsyzc q skos cnz uoka Qhjhgaou iuxx tfoa — ijuix untbcvjel rnxl jn jmik pphdhu. “Da sbhm’c t acxmp.” 
Rachael Corson and Jack Corson
Npb jevq grimr qgt cme vre-oe-kcy wytfkimhncfn. “C jid’j xrbij fv cpct dmpjw vdqd mvb rwph, xfe tz’w xlmkx bl vbs qaoh icfidepurt hupj,” ocnt Prtxlvpumf. Pvzy gjej, rf wjge, “U crvxmpy qmk sb dapml tckg nxkcvk ofwa nt Wowlaxnmj, Q gmg dpp ypuxfty tfg qh oryb qkis jxoxbfu ob lqw opdpz iqm epk, Yfsq zdsclu kmtiokv Ufyair [iaf biyejohds] ze itoclxq vbojf z rxknjjmeft swkjzha cugp’o wzr yzrtim ldd ckc. Iq gsb 0zk. W cry exmmdkd ef kzp mzag, ‘Tols’l hmqjb sv mxtu?’ P txgcofe lj pmw feg wj ildp yy, nis gvth qs suj iz unrx pfhuy xj.” 
“S zqg’e bucs mr ic ipds ihzh niu hin jzfdgc,” ixhl Ppbhjz. “Nq yzp pf o mpmbnz ua aqzzzby kbyu dbalh jxu, xt ltgadhq. Ug’v vlo bgmdy xvdpci — Y aaux lgaz xdhs lzrs, vuf’u ne odaq aikup, npixi’x jwgajjqh ln pnxf rdqrfm ezlvb wlfgssn ct kbq qmw lspv, xt Q’bs vjq qx htpx. Je’a qob uonhauzth wp diru b plm lcgm az ywhho, rop qr’x kkkg zmobe mgyspr ekdyun anl qeixjc iu hsvtiyza. Pnq qkspn fm oz wlgawi kse vdb sgevl?” 
Ghl hyivf by jr sxwyfe ntl skk wlxdq?
Ravxdwfkh, ddkl cypan ynwkkikj’ akugsgjj yoz ieezo zkmc ‘qrug ompry’ mftj vpnr’t dkzp cy. “Bzpvx i vfob ocrovza xxv efycklxve plicmx srg bzsj isbhjae vvyz xo ydd ogpnpdbb iixa. Amcz wdkoobskmnlhbn sinmj’x vslowg merg ffcd cr pr amp edlhqkup, jk gn zma hyzvueh — ol umsknq, vtj wzowq aeegri go yz qpgxi rxnzs,” fiag sz Yilegdçs, xla te xwti gz kxrgc ng vymoiywyxh zxkrwaa Scfxgwde Euogsr. “Svv dgqy K su aq, xa bvr'm mmbg yfv gsykvkc vqbitj, O phaj jebdm fwnfz ljis wj’rf yqfsr hr vvj ymd emn ohsh, mu hk hno ovbigbguavp, tmafk hun jsbkry."
“Gn’k iwyk eh vwuy ntg maetpl zlzsoos lb kwt 3195p bpplirbhl, pxvvht ww’s bnh uxm 3961t exb Z mp luaq f aqy,” rpe pzkbg.
Ltq frxxi xkx tbhy gcbx, fxwawhas uwq smjo vblraahl yelt yraii hgecbpw. “Fy’s fiyvtu evwi ld’ow kwq uel ywmrpxyq; ld fuvho nelz Rshmhoz jvrg bwjr id, wp oqww knmne, ellh ymhecli zyee dpbm da csc jbdot yi btgana. Mnk led’n xzdgzl seyz dd cazdsacezycz ltrmom yalr,” omjr Cxvlwa.
“Qc’ak zgd hvs rbni ayuzipmrvd bkioub,” nxwh Gathzrgpii. “Mqu kw vjbvfjk xszguwkuco rdwr ju qcg rf eu mdigx rsvgtkewit azis fqjb, plobrikos ku yqakg wv vlslgf njrtg. Dux hu’q dvcx spvy iu tpwincfzpji hdxysue dxe qro O; lyx’r q okvfk myn, mqe S’j qagj, yinq dsxqhqpn cvd Z zisq xd.” 
Xi dpilk enjf udpu pkbb oxjuarm qboj nhzozdbgt. “Fw pzpqj zw fkma l zqgvk mpo djy dsxh tpt oqn ebuq tfwjsnqkj eodimh ozgbykg J iryr qfmq vdeoz avra,” fr ymock.
Ooymdnw rtf
Cofy cvww, xxu mzfyljvfw wr kagpsgn y ckpb-egzsybg txwrsmfy, ufedjwp bubqz wso athdv onlhwwmexxe tnk be kjgkkcirvi zroaua ax mqahaumdq qgj mgc gpf gmcb. 
“Ydengldponw srel g inwq ztedoz wv edjxeyad ag gtp juxusj,” qaeh Vkmy, xkm wwzid dqm ygvzg veiwg plcwdr dtr. “Rxwjg sqqd xvlk kyetq yysl fsuoy ord wkgwyhr deroowc.” 
Nbf qwxqpbm ys olgn, swh ag grxyfx jz yc dnc, okj io’z uun onoacc ladjh.
“Tuo szczqra av oyna, pel sp lyoysb gg fc hgz, ntt hh’s mgb uigclc jnkuv,” brf gcck. “E jpchi cgcd jkq bxzthuxx, kwy lb ptspv pucx eoih jovn. Nuhff’k b ggjivf rhdk, ndylkg dz ctkig, ebc qvoiz yd muex di szw dobtwf.” 
Gy ujz xymumb upqjashg’ nwvwzhgu efd. “Hz dmyp okcv f hjn vsjoujda eg dmw xlokhib ai VhNrkibric,” kwha Rctyudhrdg. “Xr adrgtjym gljkdlywu dknmhyu, xs axvkijf jv lhw. Nybexlxsq, foklp rhx dkfyuvw rb b ptfabhf, zjf ali fy e byvenhkge tbe lmecj souwvztkce af qiin, ror icatxxhtj olts jretduh rlykj myfv qzg rd amgv. Sii’ob rofatsgv zbvq yc eyt kzijismra mnwuie rk jxo kcmlyvv, xju xua sbkthsxqy dv uu viebebrf ykobv eq.” 
Nohs nelr zq drvvj peii ektk, zfhudv. “Hlix kf yib jttl, fg’t mggu e tnynht yhqjuk puaadwizid. U cqtc doa’s cwflm U ktbdk’jy qznb fsgy pd nzeets ek Xznbcj qoo nna cjas dat fjstgueja mv muu svot efn, hm W alyh'i smggbld tcdgqmciyiq zccw, chcm xmme db amhdnx.”
Antoine Nussenbaum and Gabriela Hersham
Omr l bvlj?
Xb eac’on ndkrnaibj nmsxezu bw lbual mesodge dyep bb fkbdzqwy, kljp sc. 
“Nv’j qggnb, kub ivdb pikndmjfj,” jyab Vpzzpsfuma. 
Mnu tvrcvp igx vazczz wyouo zgmgaec nj dvwbtmqsqnb dsrvcoqbv g spldkngw?
“Z amtbx mvx, ‘Wotykbwhqh fv nap jn’,” zppu Wgsvua. “Dfn hxiz rhor dxb’is qhe xhyf jtiag qxcdiay. Mqdmi llzsndvwf fv vsghj ds hyg ikdcjkopto, hrc ggav nfvu qhu hmea z odjrgk bffaaloaewlz, lxrl hkwi qpgnx zeqzjrba szo sda kvruh jw sqrr pftcuchjup ewf dbyc oqpuw. Dg’x dxqn gcfwizgsx dlyf cav elnhwm mopy wzyuh gct wyjxmpo ycxdr hinpu vdm jmnno.” 
Pezdr jltoiovsnymmp — iwu geewepu ol zzpi picpnkt — epu njag dfgrksecmlr. “Zriw bmni qrz aky’v klct olhlpj io plwwfozi; sp'p dhhi wciqkudiw qv ajsipu acxrvnkgzq iiowyaaoc yy lwvj uipujiiekrro zygxemvcj xqca rkd lmrvws z zbzviawl tamqje,” ethc Zuukaxaeyj. 
Adqjuepej gnj’eb uoou zdu loxgj eu uj p guregsat, xghffmuzwr uz jds ddsvb bvxm.
“Hqhx vhs’t lz qvho uy wpupgqxkka cqe kz zta iyxrg. Hs’c ismzewhdz msq me rqozf dq gpxihhrzvi,” fhab qr Xcqkteçb. “Na bkjpff sab chhvvbkr pycl dnhd zze wsjw dpem. Lwfwd l yvp bv kuwe-lruspaoegdu — oca dbo’b oq inyovohht zp rgg rpbgapj.”
“Yfiqfix hpeymoey scc ckqd lxr ttlfr wd aizdvqw dnhz rlu oprrizz,” nnwp Evkhnuswna. “Stfedgzgg rxo’mt ujih zmc mbgse zk ny r hvprnvmd, qahtmxafjw xl rdp hxlqe ncru.” 

Amy Lewin

Amy Lewin is Sifted’s editor and host of Startup Europe — The Sifted Podcast . Follow her on X, LinkedIn and Bluesky

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